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The Finger and the Damage Done
Rusties React
First, check out the press release
from the Neil Young camp...
More info is here on HyperRust in the Evening
Coconut news column within the SAMPLE and HOLD workbook.
Rustie Matthias Chemical Computer Butterweck was the first
to point out that during Neil's final Stealth Gig (at the
Calalyst) before the finger injury,
he'd sung TWO songs with lyrics about finger damage, each
of which went to the bone!
from Truth Be Known...
When the fire that once was your friend
Burns your fingers to the bone
And your song meets a sudden end
Echoing through right and wrong
from Hard Luck Stories...
Now she's gone and you're alone
Bite your fingers to the bone
Slip away,
You feel it slip away, slip away
Rustie Serge MoMo Gironnay provided
a visual response.
Of course, adversity stimulates the Rustie creative juices.
Here's a sampling of the song adaptations that kept us in,
uh, stitches...
Slicerfinger
by David Big Red Beacon Robertson
Look out, mama, there's a sandwich sittin' on the table,
With home-made whole wheat, and some ham and mustard and cheese,
So darn big that I don't think that I'm gonna be able, with ease,
To pick it up in one piece
And eat it as I please.
It's got a pickle on the side, and tomato and romaine leaves.
When I was a boy my mother taught me good manners.
Now I won't eat a sandwich till it's neatly divided in two.
I might be smart, but I'm not always the best of planners.
So I needed to find a blade
To cut the treat I'd made
And the more I looked the more my hunger grew.
Pegi's breadknife in my hand felt reassurin'.
She'd said "Watch that steel, Neil. Be careful what you are doin'."
But all I heard was the sound of my stomach growlin'.
Raised the knife above the plate.
But my aim was not so great..
Then I saw red and I knew I'd need first-aid.
Shelter me from the slicer and the finger.
Cover me with the hands that made the dinner.
Just think of me as one you'd never figure
The doctors would not let
Put my finger to the fret.
You can tell my friends in Europe I'm sure gonna miss 'em.
I speak as one who has seen the white bone of my own right index
finger, so I do sympathize with Neil's condition. --BRB
The Digit and the Damage Done
by Marsha Whitney Doyle, RN
I caught you choppin' on my celery board
I love you, finger, but you bought the sword
Oh, oh, the digit's done...
I hit my finger had to leave my band
Almost sawed that mother off my hand
Gone, gone, the digit's done...
I sing the song, because I love my thumbs
Get a lawyer, sue the Ginsu bums
Milk'em good, 'cause my blood's runnin' out...
I sing the song, because a crummy ham
For a sandwich, I could'a used some Spam!
Uh, oh, that's in a sharp can...
I sing this song, because I love the cheese
Make mine on macaroni in the future, please
Gone, gone, the digit's done...
I've seen the digit and the damage done
A little part of it fell on the bun
But not every sandwich is like a loaded gun...
First let me say, I am sorry about Neil's mishap, and wish him speedy
healing, but we at W3.wierd.doc-n-nurse couldn't control ourselves,
being mindful of slicing and dicing as we are....
I said, BE HEALED, Neil! --MWD
Down by the Kitchen
by Ronny Hank Hendrix Watt
Be on my plate, I'll be on your plate, baby
There is no reason for you to fight
It's so hard for me cutting here all alone
When all I want is to take a bite
Yeah, it could drag me out of the bedroom, I'm hungry today
Down by the kitchen I cut my finger
Down by the kitchen,
Bad, ooh, cut it bad
You take my hand, I'll take your ham
Together we may lunch-away
This sandwich can't wait til tomorrow
I think I gotta eat it up today
Yeah, it could drag me out of my bedroom, feed me a day
Down by the kitchen I cut my finger
Down by the kitchen,
Bad, ooh, cut it bad
Shakey the Griller
by Andrew Wood (contributions from David Lybrand)
He came strolling across the kitchen
With a rumbling in his tum
Looking for a quick snack
To feed his hunger on
On the side lay bread and mustard
There was ham fresh from the grill
On that stove he'd caref'ly warmed it
And was ready for his fill
With ingredients scattered round him
Fresh loaves from the bakery
The sandwich began to take shape
For the hungry Neil to see
Finished sandwich it was enormous
Much too big to take a bite
He knew he'd have to cut it
So that he could eat it right
Pain was just a legend
And blood was never known
This time things were different
Sliced his finger to the bone
The blood it dripped from the finger
And his left hand turned to red
But it's still not really possible
To repeat the things he said
But we know he's coming here
Back to Europe, back one day
Once that finger has recovered
And healed enough to play
He came strolling across the kitchen
Shakey, Shakey
What a griller
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